spreeeeeeeng!!!

oh yes, the poor Wisconsin girl is FINALLY getting some SUNSHINE on my vitamin-D deprived body!! LOL!!

 

change is good :)

well hello friends!!

(fyi…sillygolucky werewolf got the silver bullet earlier this month. LOL.  so don’t worry, no whining this post!!)

why is change good, you ask?  well!  because for me, i like that feeling of newness…the flow of life and the bubbling and brewing of fresh plans and ideas and goals.  and personal change doesnt have to be an immediate 180.  it can be a few degrees at a time, slowly tweaking our lives in whatever ways we need so that one day we look back and say, wow, that wasnt so hard afterall :)

okay, the first big and most obvious change—i ditched the log in requirement for my blog!  ugh, i just couldnt do it any longer!  too many of my peeps just gotta have me in their reader, and of course i write so that others may read…so if they don’t read, why should i write? hehe!  also, i write about things occasionally that i do hope random folks from the web will happen upon…like nerdy food and nutrition stuff, healing my endometriosis, and holistic living.  those random visits have led me to many new and awesome resources and friends!

so, i’m done hiding.  lol.  :)  you can still log in, however, so if you leave comments all your info is intact.  having a log in will also give you access to members-only goodies that i’d like to include one of these days!  it also gives you the option of getting email notifications when something new gets posted; altho i’m not too impressed with the format in which it sends it, but that’s a detail i’ll work out later!

done with the boring schtuff now!! ;)

this year so far has been rather emotional for me.  after a few crazy health journal posts during my cleanse back in january and the last one here, i now realize i was entering the bottleneck!!  once i got past the super-intense, emotional i-must-figure-out-my-life phase of what i needed to do to figure out my life *lol*, i must say i’m feeling pretty happy :) 

it felt good to get all that crap out even tho i was out of my head and over the top!  but you know, that’s partly what blogs are, right?  a place where we somehow scrawl down those heavy places and feelings we don’t normally verbalize.  for me, it’s a good thing and part of my own process.  i’m glad to be helping others know they’re not alone in this crazy world and i love the feedback from you—it helps me learn and get thru the days!

sooo i’m thinkin if i get my creative juices flowin, i might start a new website/blog.  one of these days i’d love to make a great resource for all things traditional foods, healing endometriosis through nutrition and alternative therapies and of course a few SILLY ramblings!! lol.  i have a lot of other work-related projects on my plate right now, tho, so i’m not sure when it will happen; but the change is a’comin sometime in the sooner or later future :)

for now, i’ll just keep poppin in here on sillygolucky and also the health journal when i’m feeling the need to delve or share!

and speaking once again of changes, i’m excited to announce that this monday i’m unpackin the ol’ brain and starting in on some computer classes!  over the rest of this year i’m gonna work toward a few certificates in web design, graphics and technologies.  FUN!  i’m mostly doin it for my self-employed work projects but of course it will come in handy for fun, personal projects too :D

welp alrighty, just wanted to shout out a hello to all y’all (i’ve always wanted to say that irl. haha!).  sorry i’ve been away for a month or so—i want to try to get back in the habit of chatting on here.  it’s excellent therapy!! ;)

happy weekend!!

~jos~ 

mo-schmo. :P~

motivation-schmotivation.

being of the female persuasion sucks sometimes. 

for 3 out of every 4 weeks in a year you’re on top of the world and for the rest of the time (usually incremented into 12 sessions. uh hem.) there’s some strange werewolf-like transition (without all the fur and usually without fangs) that interferes with especially the best-laid plans.  any other thoughts, goals, emotions or excellent advice you’ve rounded up during those other weeks is totally null and void during that “other” quarter of the year.

*sigh*

usually i dont whine on my blog but i just needed to get it out today.  maybe you can join in if needed ;)

• it started last night—bad attitude about my weight, self-image and motivation. 


• went to bed at 9pm, zonked.


• woke up at 4:30 in a rotten mood.


• 7am, started this blog.


• 8am, breakfast and started working to let off some steam.


• 9:10am, my acupuncturist calls because i missed my appointment…OY!! how embarrassing!! :(:(


• 9:15am—head on my desk, bawling.


• 9:20am, friend talked me off the ledge. lol.


• present time…feeling a touch better but still gotta ways to go.

i hate it when i’m like this.  i feel so out of control!  it’s not ME! 

i used to have a lot more of these episodes when my endometriosis was at its worst.  like crying over chocolate cake and stuff.  the hormonal fluctuations were INTENSE.  pretty scary.  and guys, take my word for it, if she could NOT act and feel the way she does when the rollercoaster comes, she WOULDN’T!  it’s one of those weird phenomenon that even the most logical dude can’t explain away.  sorry.  it just has to make all involved parties suffer, and then float away in the wind like it never happened…

so anyhoo, almost a week ago i finished a 10-day cleanse that i tracked on my health journal, and i passed with flying colors! 

for 10 days not only did i cleanse my body of toxins, but my mind, too.  every morning, i had a prayer/meditation/visualization session.  i had focused intentions and generally felt happier as the cleanse progressed.  i felt positive, motivated, undaunted by the goals i’ve set for myself this year that in the past i’ve failed to reach.

if you kept up with my daily ramblings about the cleanse, you might remember me saying a few days after day 10:

i already started anticipating falling off the wagon and how i would deal with it.  and last night when i started having those cramps it made me come crumbling down, all grumpy and frustrated.  i donno why, it just did.  i guess it was only a matter of time til i fell off the top of the world.

and then today i woke up feeling zombie-ish, lazy and a little hopeless.  then i scolded myself for having so little faith in the progress i made in those 10 days.  then i comforted myself by saying it’s okay, just let it pass…ride out the frustration.  then i scolded myself again and pounded it in that the happiness i felt was REAL and sustainable.  i reminded myself how intentional i was during my quiet time, especially the visualization.  it really was starting to re-route the tracks of my derailed brain back to the main road of gratefulness and joy!

so did you notice??  i made my first mistake before i even finished the cleanse!! :-(  i used to always think that thinking ahead about how to deal with a setback was a good thing.  newp.  it just destines you to fail. 

okay, so, let’s recap.  phase 1: i doubted.  phase 2: i fell off the wagon.  phase 3 (failure): not yet reached! 

WHEW!  so there’s still time to pick up the pieces.  the bad thing is i’m split right down the middle.  the hormonal, irrational, self-destructive werewolfish side of me says nuh-uh.  (imagine your younger sibling or annoying cousin saying that, in the worst little kid way.)  i just wanna wallow today.  i want to eat cookie dough, sit on my butt and cry off and on until i cant breathe because my nose is too snotted up.

the goal-oriented, visualization guru, sillygolucky and tough-it-out-i-can-do-it part of me says this is an opportunity to help break the cycle.  the one i’ve been goin ‘round and ‘round on for nearly a decade now!  obviously i would MUCH RATHER be happy and positive, but why is this always the seemingly harder route??

so is it just as easy as i said it was the day before my cleanse?  did i really give myself a clean slate or did i just wipe the board with a dirty eraser?  what in the heck happened?  can i just be a hybrid—a sillygolucky werewolf?? LOL!!!

maybe there’s really no black and white answer.  i think ultimately, IT’S A CHOICE.   i either choose to make another chip to help break the cycle or choose to stay for another dizzying spell on the merry-go-round.

since i’m a human and i’m a woman, this won’t be the last time i’ll get this chance…but still…

i’ll let you know how it goes.

thanks for listening.

~josey~

goal #1 for 2010--a clean slate!

hey friends and fam!

if this is your first time here, welcome :)  AND, thanks for taking the time to get a password and all that fun stuff.  in the past, my blog had always been available to read for anyone surfin the net; but for now, i’ve decided to keep it open only to people i know (and who know me!) and a few select very good online buddies as well.

i’ve been blogging off and on for several years and you’ll find that i have an extensive archive if you ever get super bored ;)  haha!  you can type in random words in the search box, pick a month or even click on a subject tag word in the side bar to find ramblings that may interest you.  and btw, i DO do a lot of rambling, but sometimes i have important things to say, too.  well…at least about things that are important to me!  but hey, this is MY blog! (hrm, rambling here already…haha!)

so this year (similar to the past several years) i didnt make resolutions.  i am so over resolutions!  i have goals i want to reach that are on-going.  in the last 3 years, i’ve really hunkered down on focusing on my health since finding out i have endometriosis.  the endo has thwarted my ability to have babies, and before i get too old i am determined to overcome that—on my own with no fertility drugs or procedures.  so far, i’ve made a lot of progress.  but still…close, but no cigar…for now.

so the clean slate literally involves a 10-day cleanse i am beginning TOMORROW!  before you freak out and think i wont be eating for 10 days, read on ;)  i did one a little less than 2 years ago with excellent success.  i’ll be chatting daily about it in my health journal!  there’s also a link up top there so feel free to visit anytime. 

i want to also direct you to my original post (back in 2008) about that cleanse, entitled spring cleaning :) .  if you want to understand what in the heck i’ll be talking about for the next 10 days in my health journal, i recommend reading that post! 

i’ll also hop over there today and post a little more, as this cleanse is a little bit different than the last one.  definitely stay tuned for lots of fun health-nut ramblings!!   bwahahah!

one last thing.  the clean slate also involves ridding myself all of my expectations, previous emotional and mental blockages relating to getting healthier and my worn-out-run-down motivational issues that i’ve so miserably dragged along all these years i’ve been improving my health.  i’m trading them all in for positive, well-oiled working models!!  hehe!  yeah, it’s scary, unfamiliar territory not being too hard on myself like i always have been.  while it wasn’t beneficial, it was comfortable.  you know how it goes. 

so how did i rid myself of all of those drag-me-down things, you ask?  oh, i just decided i was going to. and i did.  end of story.  i’m tired of screwing around with negativity and over-analyzing and having to have a “process” in order to gain any healthy emotional ground.  it’s a waste of time! 

okay so maybe it didnt *poof* go away in an instant. hehe.  however, i’m not going to think about it!  i’m just going to visualize myself already at my goals, deal with emotions as they come instead of worrying or anticipating them and continue to implement a daily practice of prayer, meditation and visualization.  focusfocusfocus on the things that will bring on positive outcomes!

alrighty!  welp, i hope to see you over at my health journal over the next 10 days.  at any rate, i hope you stop in again soon :)

happy weekend!!

~josey~

peek-a-boo!

WHOA! *blinx*

*B.L.I.N.X.* lol!

hey, i’m here. lol.  WHOA i really am here! =D

do you know how many times i’ve visited my own blog since the last time i wrote?  A LOT!  and i start writing a post, then kinda lose my steam…you know how it goes!

a LOT, i mean A REAL WHOLE LOT has happened since i’ve been around here last.  i’m going to be very busy in the next few weeks, but i would like to get ya’ll caught up and maybe chit-chat here a little more often.  yeah i know, i’ve said that before, but i’ve still always come back, right? ;)  right-o!

SO!  if you’re reading this, drop me a comment and tell me how YOU are!  i wanna get caught up with everyone.

:):)

i miss my lil ole blog.  i miss being creative and gabby.  i need to come back more often.  i’m going to try!

best springy wishes to all ya out there and stop back in soon!

~jos~

 

SIMmin' it!

hey, are any of you out there a fan of the SIMS? :D

 the original SIMS character creation interface. nope, not one of my characters—but someone was definitely trying to be funny ;)i’ve been a SIMS fReAk ever since the release of their first SIMS game in 2000. :D  i remember how i was totally addicted to creating famous Hollywood sims…my fave then was folks from the Drew Carrey show, the Three’s Company cast, and the Dukes of Hazzard crew. HAHA!  and of course, you always gotta make yourself and all your family members.  and it was even more fun to hook up single members of your family to marry famous people and have kids. teehee!

then in 2002, i became a beta-tester for TSO (The Sims Online).  what  FUN—especially because i was using a dial-up internet connection. HAHA!  i played it for probably a year, then got bored because it seemed to never progress.  and sadly enough—6 years later—it DOES look the same!  i’m shocked it’s even still around. (actually—rewind—i just saw they finally shut it down just a few months ago!)  i think the funnest part about it was being able to be any kind of character i wanted to portray to other people—my fave being a 70’s lounge-meister monster whom i named Changa.  he kinda looked like a sasquatch with a butterfly collar and gold medallion necklace. HAHA!!  his specialty was serving chimichangas to all his guests—the most famous being a deep fried chocolate chimi! LOL!  of course the cooking was all pretend, but hey, that’s what the SIMS are about!   

then in 2004 i upgraded to the Sims 2…which i am currently still playing and have most all of the expansion packs.  the SIMS 2 made it wayyyy fun to build buildings and homes.  my sims own restaurants, pet stores, have gardens and markets, go to college, play in bands, live in cool apartments, build robots and flower arrangements, and all sorts of cool stuff!  what i love most about Sims 2 is that you can actually create characters that LOOK like people you know.  in the old SIMS, you just had to pick pre-made heads and bodies.  hehe.  plus, the social interaction of the sims themselves is much more rich and life-like and pretty darned intuitive.  so while it’s fun to escape to what’s closer to a “perfect” life in the world of the SIMS, you still get plenty of realism by letting them have their own free-will!

soooo nowww EA Games just announced the official release of the Sims 3 will be February 20, 2009.  it looks SO COOL!  there’s a really neato video on their homepage that shows some of the inside development of the game and all the new stuff we can expect.  im totally stoked!  i think the seamless neighborhood (you can actually wander about your neighborhood and town without having to take a taxi off your lot!) will be one of the neatest new features.  it will open up a lot of random events that will take the humdrum out of everyday sim life :)

you guessed it! that’s me in the Sims 2 playing a SIMS game! teehee :)so anyhoo, there’s my rant about the SIMS! hehe!  let me know what ya think—especially if you’re a fan like me!

tata for now…

~josey~

organizing is FUN!

hey folks! :D

as you can see, i’m feeling a trickle of creativity…so over the next few days i’m gonna clean up, organize and update my blog!

it must be this chilly fall weather that is inspiring me to sit on my butt and think of things to blog about, cause i have several posts waiting backstage! lol.

please do stop in and say hello!  what’s new in your world?  leave me a note!

more soon :)

~jos~

p.s. don’t forget about my health journal!